


Launch a Thousand Ships

by Geonn



Category: Sanctuary - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-25
Updated: 2009-11-25
Packaged: 2017-10-03 17:43:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geonn/pseuds/Geonn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>London, 1940. During the Blitz, a young doctor encounters Helen Magnus and becomes her protégé.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Launch a Thousand Ships

My world was ending when she walked into it. It was 1940, the London Blitz, and I was working at a hospital in the emergency room. I wasn't a doctor, but they weren't turning away warm bodies who knew what they were doing. I was on the way home one night when the tube station I planned to use was bombed. The cries were audible from the surface, so I dug my way down until I found warm bodies. But oh, what bodies they were. At first I thought the poor souls had been disfigured by the blast. But then I saw a man with webbed fingers, a woman with blue eyes with slits like a cat.

I hesitated, but it was brief. I began unloading them as quickly as I could, getting them to safety despite their appearance. I thought perhaps I was hallucinating, but even if I wasn't... the world was surreal enough. What were a few unusual faces compared to that? I stood in the rubble, the torn sleeve of my coat wrapped around my mouth and nose against the smoke and swirling dust. I don't know where she came from. I don't even know when she arrived. At one point, I turned, and saw this vision standing in the hole I was using to evacuate the survivors.

"Do you need a hand?"

"Yes," I said. I thought to warn the stranger not to be frightened by their appearances, but she was already helping some. I took a moment to admire the angel before going back to work. We worked together to evacuate the cavern, which it turned out was an underground hovel. Two dozen or more of the creatures had been crammed inside. I climbed out to the street and offered my assistant a hand.

She pulled herself free, brushed the debris from her dress, and smiled at me. "Well, that was exhilarating." She looked to the sky and said, "Perhaps we should adjourn to safer quarters."

"An excellent idea." I looked at the refugees, who were huddled on the sidewalk. "Where shall we...?"

"I know of a place," the woman said. She looked me over, extended a hand and said, "I'm Helen."

"Ah, the lovely Helen. Not from Troy, by chance?" I said, cheeky as always.

"Hardly," Helen said. "Come on. We can sit out the bombing together."

I smiled. Nothing had ever sounded lovelier.

We loaded the creatures - Helen called them abnormals - into a vintage bus. There was barely enough room to squeeze them all aboard, but she managed. She and I sat together in the front seat behind the driver, thighs touching. Her leg was warm, unbelievably solid under her dress. She kept her eyes on the road, half turned in the seat so she could occasionally check on the other passengers.

The place she took us was nothing less than a palace. Blacked out, naturally, but impressively Gothic under the full moon. Between the architecture and her bizarrely Victorian manner and dress, I felt like I had stumbled into a real-life Frankenstein novel.

Helen instructed her assistant to escort the abnormals 'downstairs' and show them their quarters. Then she turned to me and asked if I cared to join her in a cup of tea. I was born and raised British, so I never turned down a nice cup of tea. I followed her upstairs, down a long hallway to a gorgeous office. I took off my coat and she did the same, revealing a cream-colored blouse. She looked gorgeous in the candlelight, her features porcelain and somehow innocent. I found myself staring and quickly turned away before she could catch me.

"Is there anyone who needs to know where you are?" she asked as she handed me a cup.

"No. I live alone."

"Perhaps it's for the best, times like these. No worrying if a loved one was hurt in the latest round of bombing."

A thought dawned on me. "My God. Those creatures. Some of them seemed human."

"They are human," she said, a snap of anger in her voice.

"Right. Sorry. I merely meant that... Hitler. He must be--"

Helen smiled and shook her head. "No. I'm afraid Hitler is one hundred percent human. I've checked. Twice." She sipped her tea and walked to the couch. As she sat, she smoothed the dress against the back of her thighs and I couldn't help but admire the curve of her hips, the way the material brushed around her legs.

I sat on the loveseat across from her and we spoke at length, refilling our tea twice. By the time I realized the lateness of the hour, I knew it would be foolhardy to venture out onto the streets alone. We could still hear the drone of engines overhead, the sporadic rumble of bombs hitting elsewhere in the city. When I mentioned the predicament to Helen, she considered it thoughtfully.

"I could have my manservant drive you home. He would have to drive without headlamps, of course, which is hazardous at night. I would offer to let you sleep here, but I'm afraid all the rooms are filled with the guests you helped rescue this evening."

"Good Samaritaned my way out of a warm bed, it seems," I said.

"Had you known, would you have responded differently?"

I didn't have to think. "No. Not at all."

Helen smiled and nodded as if she had made a choice. "In that case, I would be honored to have you share my bed."

I wasn't sure I had heard right. "Pardon?"

"We are adults. We can behave properly, I'm certain. I would hate to think of you suffering on the couch simply because you did the right thing. My bed is certainly large enough."

I nodded slowly, unable to think of a way out of this. "Fine. We _are_ adults."

Helen smiled. "Splendid. I'll show you the way."

We walked the same dim corridors, but they felt different. I was being invited into the inner sanctum; that had an entirely different feel than simply being a guest. Helen led me into a large antechamber, and then into an ornate bedroom. She gestured at the bed and then nodded to a door to my right. "The facilities are there, if you wish to bathe."

"Thank you. I think I'll just wash some of the dust off."

"A good idea," Helen said.

I stepped into the en-suite and filled the sink. I wet a towel and used it to clean the white plaster from my face and forehead. I scrubbed my hands and then, knowing Helen was waiting on the other side of the door, took the opportunity to undress. I folded my clothes on the counter and held them in front of myself as I stepped into the main room. I was nervous returning to the room in just my underwear, but Helen - seated on the edge of the bed - made no sign that she noticed my state of undress.

"All done?"

"Yes."

She stood and said, "Pick the side of the bed you're comfortable with. I can deal with either." She smiled and went into the bathroom, quietly closing the door behind her.

I hesitantly climbed onto the bed, testing its firmness before I stretched out. I folded my hands over my stomach and stared at the ceiling, listening to the quiet splashes of water as Helen performed her ablutions. I closed my eyes and saw her in a lacy slip, turning her head to one side so that her dark, curly hair trailed like ivy over the tower of her throat. She placed a washcloth against her skin and the water coursed down, over her collarbone to the swell of her breast.

I sighed and moved a hand to my hip, teasing myself but not quite touching. My fantasy continued until I could almost feel the soft weight of her breast against my palm, separated only by the thin silk of her undergarments. I would look into her eyes, those utterly blue eyes, and I would see her giving me permission. I would lower the material, bow my head like a supplicant, take her nipple into my mouth...

The bathroom door opened and I gasped, trying to hide my arousal as she approached the bed. She was indeed dressed in a slip, but not lacy or silk. It was a plain cotton shift, and somehow it aroused me even more than lace would have. I saw the hard beads of her nipples against the material and quickly looked away. Helen lowered herself onto the mattress, drew the blankets up over her, and quietly said, "Would you like me to leave the lantern on?"

"No," I said. "That's fine."

I heard her soft breath and the room went dark. Helen lay down and I closed my eyes, fighting for sleep. My eyes were closed and I had nearly succeeded when she moved again, put her hand on my shoulder, and said, "Good night."

"Good night," I said, hoping she hadn't felt me jump. My skin felt like it was on fire under her touch, and I knew she could feel me shuddering. She remained on her side, facing me, for a long moment until I turned my head to face her.

She smiled in the darkness - I could see a flash of moonlight on her teeth, and she said, "There's no need to be frightened. We won't be bombed."

"You're sure of that?"

"As sure as one can be. We have a certain... insurance policy. This building will remain standing in this spot until the fourth of October, 1954."

"What happens then?"

Helen shook her head. "My sources didn't deign to tell me."

"God forbid another war. The planet couldn't bear it."

"Agreed," Helen said. She rested her hand on my shoulder again and I felt my body react to her touch. God, why did she have to be so soft, so warm, so gorgeous? Why couldn't she just let me roll over and sleep until morning?

"Well," she said again. "Pleasant dreams." She bent down and intended, I'm sure, to kiss my cheek. But our awkward positions in the bed, as well as the darkness, led to her lips meeting mine. It was the briefest of touches, and she withdrew without acting self-conscious or nervous.

"Good night," I said when I regained the ability to speak.

We lay in the darkness for a while before she said, "I wish to speak with you in the morning, if you're able to stay for breakfast. I have a sort of business opportunity I would like to offer you."

It seemed innocent in the night, so I nodded. "Sure. Okay."

Her breathing settled a few minutes later, and I knew she was asleep. I could feel her curves against my side, the warmth of her body trapped under the blankets with me. I longed to touch her, to roll over and pull her to me. I wanted to spend the evening wrapped in her arms. It took all of my strength not to do it, and I knew sleep would never come that night. I lay flat on my back, fingers laced over my stomach, and grew accustomed to the way she breathed.

#

Our conversation took place over a decadent breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon and sausage. There was barely enough to sate our hunger, what with rations, but Helen had somehow managed to have an unending supply of tea. I heartily approved. Sunlight streamed in through the windows, blackout curtains tucked away by a large man in a butler's outfit. Helen offered me a position as her protégé based on how I reacted with the abnormals in the tube. "They were in need. What else could I have done?"

"Exactly. Others may have recoiled in disgust, considered them less than human, left them to die. Your reaction, whether you admit it or not, was not typical, I'm afraid. That is why I need someone like you to assist me. If you'll be willing."

"Perhaps," I said, "a trial period."

Helen raised an eyebrow and dipped her chin. "I would agree to that."

I nodded and refilled my tea. I offered it to her and we tapped the rims together.

The rest of the day as taken up relocating Helen's new guests to other 'Sanctuaries' around the world. I couldn't fathom how she managed to get flights to all corners of the globe at a moment's notice, but by late afternoon, the people we had saved we all gone. I had watched with a mixture of awe and confusion as she bid another guest farewell and saw them off. When she was done, she escorted me back into the building. "It would seem we have rooms available now, so we won't have to share tonight."

"A pity," I said before I could withdraw the words. "I-I just mean--"

"I understand. At times like these, it is comforting to have a warm body next to you in the dark." She hesitated at the doorway and turned to look at me. "Perhaps it is unnecessary to move simply because the rooms are available. If you do not mind the company."

I shook my head. "Not at all."

She held the door open for me, and I thanked her as I brushed past. I could smell her perfume, the alluring scent I had caught from her bathroom while I bathed earlier that morning. It was definitely something to which I could become accustomed.

#

Days became a swirl of activity, alternating between hunting and fleeing creatures. Some did not wish to accompany Helen to the Sanctuary, while others were reluctant to trust humans. The police were alternatively sources of information and of frustration, allies and enemies depending on the day and sometimes on the hour. The more time I spent with Helen, the more impressed I became with her. As a woman, as a fighter, as a scientist.

It was these feelings that made our evenings torture. We shared a bed and, on occasion, clung to one another during the particularly bad bombings that tore apart our city. I became familiar with the feel of her body against mine, the subtle shift of cloth over her naked flesh. We bathed in the same tub, though never together, and I felt as if I could feel her presence while I soaked. I began using these times to relieve my stress. Better there than in bed where Helen could oh, so easily catch me.

I discovered just how easily one evening when I woke to hear Helen in the throes of what I thought was a nightmare. I turned and drew her to me, whispering assurances that she was safe. "Shh. It's all right. I'm here. I'm right here." I already had her in my arms, my lips on her ear, before I realized both hands were between her legs, her nightgown twisted up around her waist.

I tried to pull away, but Helen moved one hand up and gripped my arm. "Please," she gasped. "Please, please."

I didn't know if she was awake or still inside her fantasy, so I remained where I was. I tried not to look down, but I couldn't stop myself. Her legs were muscular and pale in the darkness, painted by the moon to look like marble. She arched her back, stretching her nightgown across her breasts. Her nipples were erect, the material taut as she breathed hard, thrusting against her hand.

"Helen," I whispered, and I lowered my lips to hers. She drew in a sharp breath and then I tasted her tongue, sweeping across mine as I slid closer to her. She clung to me and I thrust against her body, my pajamas riding roughly across sensitive flesh. Helen lifted her chin, grunted and tensed as she came. Her fingers dug into my upper arm and I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from crying out.

Her head fell to the pillow, and I stroked her hair. I kissed her face, brushing my lips over her cheeks and eyebrows. When I kissed her eyelids, she pressed her body to mine and breathed a satisfied moan. I bent to kiss her again and, my lips an inch from hers, she said, "John."

I pulled back quickly, chiding myself for giving in to temptation. I carefully extricated myself and arranged her bedclothes for her. I kissed her lips, chastely this time, and retreated to my side of the bed. I stared at the ceiling until I heard Helen's breathing even out, and then I moved my hand between my legs and began to stroke.

#

For six months, I had Helen basically to myself. Abnormals came and went, stayed for a few days or a few weeks, and then left for parts unknown. The ones who chose to remain and make a home at the Sanctuary were self-sufficient and it wasn't unusual to go several days without encountering them.

I felt like I had stumbled into one of those Jane Austen novels my mother used to read. A huge Gothic mansion, a reclusive millionaire... okay, the rich recluse in this case was female, but the effect was the same. I was assigned quarters and Helen's driver took me back home so I could pack my things. But by some unspoken agreement, we continued to spend nights in the same room.

One evening, lying awake and listening to the bombs outside, Helen said, "It's never been like this. I never dreamed I would live to see the end of the world."

I rolled on to my side to face her. In the darkness, I found the courage to touch her face. I ran my thumb over her bottom lip and she let my thumb slip into her mouth. I held my breath and leaned in, kissing between her eyebrows. My heart pounded, my breath coming in quick, ragged gasps as I slid closer to her. I removed my thumb, but she kept her lips parted. We kissed then, and I held my breath so I wouldn't break the spell.

Helen's hands eased over my body, touching me through my pajamas, and then her fingertips touched bare flesh. I moved my hand to her breast and cupped it through her nightgown, seeking out and teasing the puckered nipple with my fingers. Helen sighed against my lips and I moved my hand lower, between her legs, pressing the thin cotton against her mound and stroking. I kissed down her throat and she lifted her gown, freeing me to slip my fingers inside.

My breath caught and I closed my eyes. "It's all right," Helen breathed, her lips moving against my cheek. Her hand moved to my stomach and she brushed it with the backs of her fingers before moving down. I gasped, arched my back and shuddered as her fingers touched me. I kissed her again, I couldn't resist, and listened as her breathing grew rough. I moved my lips to her cheek and felt how hot it was, and I knew she was close to orgasm. I brushed her clit with my thumb and Helen grunted, and I moved my lips to her throat and gently nipped at it with my teeth.

Helen whispered my name as she climaxed, and I kept my body pressed to hers as long as possible. She continued to touch me until I came as well, resting her head on my shoulder and breathing heavily as I trembled.

"Should the world end," she whispered, "at the very least I will end it in good company."

I smiled and touched her hair, held her close, reluctant to let her go for fear I would never be in this position again. "Helen," I whispered.

She quieted me, shook her head, and said, "Just sleep. It's all right."

I nodded and closed my eyes. Let the world end, so long as I died with Helen in my arms, it would be worthwhile.

#

The end of my time at the Sanctuary came brutally fast and completely unexpected. Helen and I continued to share her bed and, from time to time, we would make love. I always let Helen make the first move for fear of appearing too eager. By day, we remained mentor and protégé, hunting and protecting abnormals in equal measure. Curfew made getting out at night difficult, but if anyone could pull it off, it was Helen Magnus.

One night, she received a tip of an abnormal living in a bombed-out remnant of an apartment building. It was dusk, and I suggested we wait until morning to venture out. Helen, ever the adventurer, chided me for being overly cautious and assured me we would be safe. Against my better judgment, I followed her.

The apartment building was all the way across town. We could see the enemy planes overhead and I was sure that the pilots could see us moving through the destruction. Helen was unconcerned and continued on as if it were a normal evening and we were on our way to the cinema. When we arrived, we discovered that the western face of the building had been shorn away, exposing the rooms within like a child's dollhouse. The upper floors were protected by a thin black sheet that waved in the wind like a pirate's flag.

"That's where we'll find our quarry," Helen said.

"What did your contact tell you to expect?"

"It's an abnormal using his powers to bully other homeless in the area into giving him food, supplies. Starving people that can barely feed themselves are handing over precious rations to this beast so he won't come after them in the night. I intend to show him the error of his ways." She withdrew a revolver from her coat, checked the ammo, and handed it to me. "I assume you can use this."

"Definitely," I said. "My father was in the last war." I examined the gun; a pristine Beretta M1934. "I'm sure you got this legally."

"Quite legally," Helen assured me. "The owner had absolutely no use for it any longer." She took another gun from her coat and checked the street. Two people were walking toward us and Helen motioned for me to stay back. She waited until the people were close and stepped out of the shadows. "Pardon me. There's no need to be frightened." She took off her coat and held it out to the woman. "I was wondering if you would mind exchanging jackets. Mine for yours. If you agree, you can keep whatever rations you have and return home."

The couple exchanged a dubious look. Helen's jacket was brand-new, highly expensive, while their clothes were worn and patched with sloppy squares of spare clothing.

"Please," Helen said.

The man prodded his wife forward, and she took Helen's coat. As the exchange was made, the man said, "He won't like it. He'll send someone after us to get the food."

"You won't have to worry about him after tonight. I promise."

Helen waved me forward and I exchanged coats with the man while she questioned him about procedures and how to access the apartment. It was a little big on me, but I would be able to turn up the collar and hide my face from the sides. Helen checked to make sure I was ready, sent the homeless couple away in their new coats with their rations tucked safely underneath, and we crossed to the apartment.

I followed Helen up the exposed stairs, the flickering light of bombings intermittently brightening the night around us. When we reached the top floor and Helen knocked on the door. "We have a delivery," she said, altering her accent to have a more Cockney lilt.

The door opened and a voice said, "Bring it inside."

The apartment was rank and freezing, cold air blowing in past the sheet. A small fire crackled in a trash can, offering meager warmth. Strips of cloth hung from the ceiling and Helen held them out of the way as we ventured deeper into the front room. "Hello?"

"Leave it."

"Where?"

A deep, guttural snort and then, "Who sent you? Why have I not seen you before?"

"My sister is sick. We're bringing--"

It happened so quickly I didn't have a chance to react. The strips of cloth hanging from the ceiling parted and a man slammed into Helen from the left. She didn't have time to react as the man tackled her, disappearing behind another curtain of cloth. I brought out my gun and aimed at the spot where they had disappeared, but I didn't dare fire. "Helen!" I shouted.

A gunshot echoed elsewhere in the room, and I began trying to fight my way through the maze of hanging cloth. "Liar!" the creature shouted, and I tried to follow the sound of his voice.

Helen shouted my name and I said, "Where are you?"

The cloth parted and I was face to face with the creature. It looked like a man, but his shaggy beard did little to hide the protrusions coming from his chin. I brought the gun up, but he shoved me away before I could fire. I fell to the floor and saw him step out into the open, clutching Helen to his chest. He had one massive hand around her throat, the other arm wrapped around her waist to hold her off the ground.

"Who sent you?"

"We're from the Sanctuary," I said, bringing the gun up. "Let her go."

He laughed. "Not very convincing."

"Shoot him," Helen rasped. "You must."

The man twisted so that Helen's face was in front of his. "Fire if you dare."

"He will kill me anyway," Helen said, "for God's sake, _fire_."

"Put your weapon down."

I hesitated and, a moment later, lowered my gun. "Don't hurt her."

He laughed and tossed Helen aside like she was a rag doll. I followed her with my eyes, fearing the worst as she tumbled through the curtains of dirty cloth. When I turned back to face the creature, I realized my mistake. He was on top of me before I could react. He closed his hand around my throat, pinned me to the floor, and showed me the fierce claws on his other hand. "Exceedingly foolish," he said, his rancid breath washing over my face.

"Yes, you are," Helen said. The creature turned just as Helen thrust a burning shred of newspaper into his face. She had taken the paper out of the burning trash can and used it to ignite the abnormal's beard. He shrieked and released me, falling off of me as he attempted to extinguish the flames. He slapped his face with both hands, but that only managed to catch his sleeves on fire. Helen grabbed the back of his jacket and hauled him up, using all her weight to haul him across the floor.

I got to my feet, found my gun and pursued them. At the black cloth, Helen released the man's jacket and said, "I can help you!"

The man either didn't hear her or chose to ignore her. He tore at his beard, howling in pain as he tried to extinguish the spreading flames. Helen grabbed a cloth from the ceiling, wrapped it around his head and used it to smother the fire. Once the man stopped convulsing, she released him and stepped back. "You left me no choice. I apologize, but--"

The man roared and swung a clawed hand at her face. Helen brought up her gun and fired twice, both bullets landing center mass on his torso. The impact of the bullets knocked him back on his heels. They might not have been enough to stop him on their own, but they pushed him to the ragged opening left by a German bomb. He grabbed at the black cloth that billowed in the wind and shouted as he lost his balance. He pulled the curtain down with him, the ends fluttering in the wind like a cape.

I joined Helen at the edge and peered down at the creature and his impromptu burial shroud. "Good Lord," I breathed. I looked at Helen and saw a bleeding cut on her cheek. Her throat was bruised and she looked pale. I reached out to touch her. "Are you ok--"

Helen brushed my hand away and turned without saying a word. I looked down at the body of the abnormal, a crowd of people gathering around to examine it, and the followed Helen from the apartment.

We dumped the borrowed coats in a doorway, knowing someone would make use of them before too long, and walked the rest of the way to the Sanctuary. Helen didn't speak to me beyond expressing her hope that the burns disguised the abnormal man's appearance enough that no one would make a fuss. "I'll speak to the coroner in the morning to be certain."

"Would you like me to go with you?"

"I can do well on my own, thank you."

When we arrived back at the Sanctuary, Helen went to the infirmary to tend her wounds. Though uninvited, I joined her there after changing into lighter clothes. She wore the same trousers and turtleneck as she wore to the apartment, and I saw spots of blood on the collar of her shirt. She looked up when I entered, but said nothing.

I watched her apply a butterfly bandage to the cut on her cheek and said, "That could have gone better."

"Yes. It certainly could have."

"What's wrong? You've been giving me the cold shoulder since we got back."

"You should have shot him when you had a chance."

"I never had an opening."

Helen turned to me. "You did. And you refused to take it. That is unacceptable."

"You're angry because I didn't shoot you?" I blinked and shook my head. "Helen, that is madness. You can't possibly think--"

"The shot may not have been fatal. There is a large possibility that I would have survived, as would the abnormal man. We'll never know now."

"There's also a possibility you would be dead. I couldn't bear that."

Helen closed her eyes and looked away from me. "Have you any idea how long I've lived? How much death I've seen? There will be a time and a place for my death, I know that. I don't need anyone else risking their lives or their safety for me."

"I could never have shot you."

"And that is why you must leave."

I thought I had misheard. I was sure she merely meant I had to leave the infirmary, but a part of me knew the truth. I opened my mouth to argue, but Helen shook her head. "Pack your things. It would be best if you left tonight. I'll have someone drive you back to your apartment."

"But I'm meant to be your protégé. Take up the mantle when you--"

"When I what?" Helen turned on me, eyes wide with anger. "So many times, I have watched people I've taken under my wing sacrifice their safety. So often I have watched as they died to save my life. I have lived nearly a hundred years and I have children stepping in front of bullets for me. I will not have that, not now, not ever. You will not change. We will, at some point, find ourselves in a similar situation, and you will repeat what happened tonight. And perhaps this time I will not be able to save you. I apologize. The failure is with me, not with you. This life is not for everyone. It is not for you. Please. Go."

I couldn't argue with that. I couldn't even begin to try. I turned away from her and went upstairs, the last time I ever saw Helen Magnus and I wanted to throttle the woman. I packed up my seldom-used quarters and went down to the front doors. Helen's manservant was waiting and escorted me out to the car. I gave one last look to the Sanctuary and thought, perhaps, I saw her in one of the upper windows. But I couldn't be sure.

The drive was silent, bitterly angry. I punched the seat a few times, cursed Magnus' name under my breath. The driver stopped the car on a rubble-strewn street and I frowned. "Why are you stopping? You were supposed... to take me home." I opened the car door and stepped out onto my street. My apartment building was gone. Flattened, as if it had never been there. The manservant got out of the car and said, "Is there somewhere else you could go?"

"Yes," I said. "Take me to the hospital."

Like Alice through the Looking Glass, or the girl Dorothy in the Wizard film, I returned to the emergency room where I had once volunteered. Victims still cried for relief, wounds still bled through bandages quicker than we could redress them, and the world became a cacophony of misery and pain. I immediately went to work, helping whomever I could in whatever capacity I could.

I had been working nearly half an hour when one of the doctors recognized me. "Haven't seen you around here in a while. Where've you been?"

"Down the rabbit hole," I responded.

The doctor laughed and said, "Well. Good to have you back."

I nodded, but I wasn't sure how 'back' I really was. I had been expelled by someone I had grown to love. My home was gone. I had been granted a look into a world I never knew existed, a world of monsters and legendary creatures, but the loss I was mourning the hardest was Helen Magnus. I had little doubt that Helen Magnus could launch a thousand ships and burn the topless towers of Ilium. Her power was unmatched, in strength and in beauty.

For the rest of the war, I focused on my work at the hospital. I moved into the small apartment shared by a doctor and his family, sleeping on the floor so their grandmother could have the couch. I finally moved out, found my own place, and watched the war come to an end. By that time, Helen Magnus and her menagerie had receded to the corners of my mind. I still thought of her, but as only a particularly pleasant dream. I had ceased to believe, I think, that she was really out there somewhere. She was a legend, a rumor, and it was less painful to believe I had imagined our time together than to remember why we had parted.

I allowed the myth to become real only once more. The fifth of October, 1954, a decade after our last encounter, I instructed a cab driver to take me to the Sanctuary. I only barely remembered the way, and was sure I had gotten something wrong when he pulled to a stop in front of a wide pit. The driver watched me stare through the window for a long moment before he said, "Weren't anna-thin' bad, do you understand?"

I looked at him. "I'm sorry?"

"It didn't blow up or nothing. Woman what owned it, 'cided to try her luck in the States. Picked up the entire place and moved it over there."

"So she's gone?"

"Yep. Her an' her whole kit and caboodle. Outta London."

I fell back against the seat and said, "Thank you. You can drive on."

"Anywhere in particular?"

I shook my head, tears stinging my eyes. "Take me to Charing Cross Hospital."

"You got it."

The cab pulled away from the curb, and I couldn't resist one final look over my shoulder. The Sanctuary was gone, as Helen's mysterious 'sources' had predicted, but it lived on. Helen was alive, but out of my reach. That was fine. The wounds left by our parting were soothed by the memories of happier times. The questions of what might have been were tempered by the fact I knew for certain I could never be what she asked of me.

I turned away from the spot where the Sanctuary once stood and put it out of my mind. I prayed one day that Helen would find what she was looking for, a protégé who would live up to her expectations. But I was not hopeful; the human heart was no match for the face that could launch a thousand ships.


End file.
